To make the week pass by

A scene from the new "Bruno" movie was caught on tape by a passerby walking through the airport in Wichita, Kansas. Its the first time gay men have appeared in Kansas since that whole Oz debacle.

Is this offensive?

The April cover of Vogue magazine, a photo featuring LeBron James and Giselle Bunchen, has sparked some controversy in the blogosphere. The image places James in a wide stance, holding on to the model in one hand. The image has been compared to an old US army recruitment poster.

The photograph was snapped by veteran photographer Annie Leibovitz, who is known for borrowing imagery from old iconic films.

Could it be that Leibovizt was "using one of the world's most famous black men to portray a ferocious gorilla carrying off a white woman", as one blogger puts it. Or nothing more then a photograph of two people on top of their respective (and unrelated) fields.

The REAL Subprime Lending Crisis

Irony Alert!!! Ah, what a relief! It wasn't Countrywide's fault all along folks. The Subprime crisis can, in fact, be linked back to just one person.

It Pays to Be Rich

Last night a fireworks malfunction at WWE's Wrestlemania sent hot ambers into the packed crowd, injuring at least 40 people. The accident occurred near the finale of the event, held at the Florida Citrus Bowl Stadium.

This is further proof of the socioeconomic divide facing America today. If you're wealthy enough to attend a "real" sport's main event, such as the NFL's Super Bowl, a malfunction means seeing Janet Jackson's bare breast. However, if you live in a trailer and save up all year to see steroid-enhanced actors fondling one another in a ring, a malfunction equates to second degree burns and uncompensated medical bills.

If the U.S. Election were an Online Pick’em Tournament…

Although sports isn't necessarily our forte here, the NCAA tournament certainly calls for drastic measures. And, yes, there are some potent political lessons to be learned here on the part of the Democrats. This is a sporting event that manages to take 64 groups of young black and white men, usher them throughout the country with a stressful schedule and still determine a winner in a month. Still beats a year and a half, no?

Both presidential candidates, Barack Obama and John McCain, earlier this month released their picks for the tournament. While they may not agree on various policy issues, especially the future course of action in Iraq, they do concur that the University of North Carolina will win the championship.

First, Obama picked three of the the four finalists, missing only Memphis, who he believed would fall to Pittsburgh in the regional semi-finals. In Obama’s defence, however, he is still campaigning. If he were to have picked against Pittsburgh there may have been grave repercussions in the upcoming Pennsylvania primary. With 158 delegates at stake on April 22 and another 115 up for grabs on May 6 in North Carolina, Obama’s bracket is a nice combination of common sense...and gutless politicking. Take your pick.

McCain’s blunder was much worse. He also picked three of the four finalists, but thought the University of North Carolina would beat Connecticut in the final. UConn, however, ended up pulling a Rudy Giuliani and lost in the first round to San Diego. McCain’s Elite Eight picks, of which he picked only 4 correctly, was heavy with schools from red states: two schools from North Carolina, two from Tennessee, and then Texas and Kansas rounding it out. Of of the two exceptions, afore-mentioned UConn was likely a thank-you to Senator Joe Lieberman; Georgetown, the other blue standing out in the group, payed homage to top aide Mark Salter’s Alma matter.

Hilary Clinton, on the other hand, deferred her NCAA picks to her husband, who subsequently decided to pass. Ominous foreshadowing perhaps?

After 60 games, Obama has correctly picked the winners of 38 games while McCain has chosen correctly 36 times. Overall, this equates to 63.3% accuracy versus a still-impressive 60%.

Ultimately, what this all means is, yes, politics and Bracketology are both crap shoots. The moral of the story - with all four number one seeds now going to the final four - is that most likely Abigail from the mailroom is going to win your office pool. And Obama and McCain will now fire the guys who were tasked with making them look "hip" via basketball picks.

Beware of 'Western Looking' Militants

On NBC's Meet the Press today CIA director Michael Hayden spoke to various U.S. national security issues, particularly Al-Qaeda's evolving terror tactics. Training Islamic militants in the lawless region between Pakistan and Afghanistan, the group is increasingly targeting "Western" looking recruits. These blue-eyed, blond-haired extremists would theoretically face less scrutiny when attempting to enter the United States.

"That they are bringing operatives into that region for training, operatives that ... wouldn't attract your attention if they were going through the customs line at Dulles with you when you're coming back from overseas," Hayden said.

To combat this chilling trend the Department of Homeland Security has immediately changed the protocol at its land, air and sea borders. Now posted at all U.S. Customs facilities is an updated, hypothetical profile of the "new" Al-Qaeda operative. Customs agents - while also attempting to curb the smuggling of child pornography - will be able to quickly reference this picture when determining a person's admissibility for entry:

North Dakota: Where Offensive Happens

A simpler time and place treated skits with blackface and simulated homosexual acts with reverence; they were even embraced. Frank Sinatra's legacy reminds us of this golden age.

While far-off this period in entertainment history may seem, apparently present day North Dakota is providing the backdrop for a racist renaissance.

Students at North Dakota State University recently put on a skit where a white student, in blackface, played the role of Barack Obama. In the same sketch two other students, wearing cowboy hats, reenacted a scene from Hollywood's endearing tale of two friends' gay love on the range, Brokeback Mountain.

After a predictable public outcry, the classic “ignorant hick defence” was employed. A school spokesman said the students involved were from rural North Dakota communities offering little diversity.

And the worst part? The show wasn’t even funny. Josh Reimnitz, the NDSU student body president, said "I didn't know what the point was of the entire skit.”

Have you Seen my Baseball?

Our worst fears have finally been realized: one of the Democratic Presidential nominees is now riding the short school bus.

With the ever-popular duo of Hal Johnson and Joanne McLeod* looking on, Saturday saw Barack Obama deliver yet another powerful, inspiring speech. “My attitude is Senator Clinton can run as long as she wants," Obama said.

Congratulations DNC, months of drawn-out bickering, racial tensions and hilarious black liberation theology Youtube videos have denigrated into little more than political ParticipACTION.

Now, the prevailing question deals with whether the New York State Governorship is merely another participant ribbon. Giuliani's "special" too, though...

* The affable stars of Body Break were not actually in attendance

Society's Double Standards

It's remarkable how this world can unequivocally endorse one thing for being "cute," and yet harshly condemn something similar the same day. For instance, when a lovesick swan mates with an inanimate object it's deemed sweet, romantic and endearing by all observers. However, when a man engages in such behaviour it is pursued as a felony sex crime by local authorities

Magic Is Real!!!....Gay

Brilliant parody.

Terrorism: Canadian Edition!!!

Canada's culture is most often defined by its capacity to be distinctly un-American. For instance, we put Canadian flags on our backpacks to inform the World of our "neighbour to the north" (note the u) status. In fact, we publicly fund horrible commercials to inform us of just how different we really are.

But, honestly, when you put Hockey, bad French, cold winters, sweet Native reserves, the Tragically Hip and the CBC aside, Canada is simply America. "No!" yells a tuque-wearing Canuck over the roar of his Canadian Tire snow blower. We're totally different! Our values are different! We think differently!

Really?

It is this awkward, unrelenting pursuit of highlighting uniqueness (or lack thereof) leaving us prone to cultural masochism. We end up hurting ourselves with extraneous efforts to show off a difference that is never there. It's a "look at me" attitude taken too far - essentially, we're the Jamie Lynne Spears of the G8.

Take, for example, the countless "Canadian editions" of popular television shows. Included in this list are Canada's Next Top Model, Canadian Idol, and Deal or No Deal Canada. Sure, it's cute when Sweden and Japan try, but there's something undeniably amiss when Canada attempts to emulate American pop culture. It's as if William Hung were to think he's ACTUALLY on par with Ricky.

The worst example of such Canadian cultural posturing (with self-deprecating results) is the current "Toronto 18" terrorism trial.

Allegedly, in 2005 near Gravenhurst, Ontario 18 young Muslims took part in a terrorist 'training camp.' There they "wore hooded camouflage and participated in various military-style exercises including marching, obstacle course training and firearms training." During down time they "viewed videos of an extremist and violent nature." Residents of the neighbouring community have been skeptical of these claims, however, saying the town is so tight-knit they would have noticed 18 camouflaged men (let alone visible minorities) doing calisthenics. They would have stuck out like a leprechaun in the ghetto.

Transcripts of the car rides back from the camp, near a Native reserve, reveal plots to overthrow the "new Rome," behead politicians and then 'kill everybody.' Sounding more like Question Period than jihadist, one of the plotters - in referring to the former Prime Minister - said they should go to Ottawa and kill "Paul um what's his name – Paul loser" (Harper was actually in power at the time).

But other than the big talk, what actually makes this case any more than a bunch of guys who really need to get out of Brampton on the weekends, a meagre combination of Brownies and Scouts (too much?)? Honestly, it sounds more like a bout of sexual frustration fueled by childhoods chalk full of Bollywood films, obligatory Diwali gatherings and Kraft Dinner envy. It's a tough childhood when your white friends have t.v. dinners to your Lamb Dhansak.

So now, armed with rap music, unassuming parents and the Koran apparently they were ready to take on the world. Or not.

It was revealed by an RCMP informant's report that "this hapless F-Troop, who ventured into the deathly cold of winter without a proper tent ... was reduced to sleeping in the vehicles at night to prevent freezing to death." The 18 young men would go "trooping off to the Tim Hortons multiple times a day for coffee and use of the bathroom."

In concluding, these guys were obviously hacks, not anything close to 'terrorists.' They talked big, but were wholly incapable of orchestrating plans. Canada can perpetuate a false front in the name of global security, but ultimately it won't hold up in the courts.

This was politicking when the case first emerged, and it still is. Perhaps it would be better for Canada to be self-effacing, realizing that fake publicity is worse than none at all (see: Canada's Next Great Prime Minister). Simply painful.

Fight, For Your Write, to Partaaaaaaaaaay!

English suffers at the hands of the occupation. Find the story here.